Tuesday, December 16, 2008

The Future First Couple...But Not Really.

America's most celebrated drag queen posing as both Michelle and Barack Obama. Not surprisingly, RuPaul is plays a much more convincing First Lady... dare, I say much hotter than the actual future first lady.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Another Great SNL Short...

"Gizzed in My Pants"... I love this, another Andy Samberg success. Cameos by Justin Timberlake, Molly Sims...

Not Everything Needs To Be Done Together...

The TwoDaLoo is a toilet made for two. Just the thought of it disgusts me. The TwoDaLoo is billed as the world's first toilet two people can use ... at the exact same time. It brings couples closer together and conserves our water supply all with one flush. The TwoDaLoo features two side-by-side toilet seats with a modest privacy wall in between. An upgraded version includes a seven inch LCD television and iPod docking station. Wait.. and this is to "SAVE A ROCKY MARRIAGE?!?" I would think it would assist in immediate divorce.

Oh yeah, because a "modest privacy wall" makes it all okay. WTF! Available now for wholesale?@?!?!?!? The units cost $1,400 apiece and the minimum order is 12. So yeah, you could crap and piss out in the open with 23 other people? Made in China...SURPRISE.

I Don't Think I Want To Know...

This is not photo shopped or altered in any way. This is just Michael Jackson going out to buy some antiques... in full Zorro gear. How reporters can even identify that is him is COMPLETELY beyond me.

Like A Cat!

President George Bush had shoes thrown at him during a press conference in Baghdad yesterday. An Iraqi journalist, who surprisingly didn't get his ass shot, whipped not one but BOTH of his shoes at the president after calling him a "dog."

That's ONE Definition of "Art"

True or False: Artist Paul McCarthy's is currently displaying a public sculpture entitled “Santa with Butt Plug” at the Middelheim Sculpture Museum in Antwerp, Belgium. Unbelievably - TRUE! http://www.artinfo.com/news/story/29546/santas-little-helper/

However, you don't have to travel all the way to Belgium to get a little piece of this sex toy-holding Santa, he'll be available as a MILK CHOCOLATE MOLD, I'm not kidding, at McCartney's Peter Paul Chocolates. At $100 a piece, make sure you get this gift for someone "special"... wow, what a DEAL considering the economic situation we're in now!

That Was The BEST They Could Think Of????

The soft drink made with your cat in mind.... but really, were the creators trying to pull one over on us? And why would any pet like fizzy drinks? If this makes money, I'm seriously in the wrong field... let's be honest, some crazed club promoter is going to think this is funny and sell it to club kids mixed with vodka. "Vodka with a splash of Pussy Pop please."

Just Eat It...

Madonna totally eats it during a concert in Brazil. Honestly, the rest of the dance sequence is so discombobulated that I'm not sure I would have noticed.

This Year's "Southwest" Incident...

Everyone's trying to find out more about Sondra Fortunato on Google today apparently... Who is she you say? Sondra Fortunato is a Giants superfan who was forcibly removed from the game this weekend because her outfit was "offending" other people in the stadium. Ms. Fortunato, who's been a fixture at Giants games for more than 30 years, was wearing a Santa Claus outfit complete with a tiara, fishnet stockings, a bathing suit bottom and high-heeled boots. Fortunato defended herself vigorously against the charges, saying, “”Nothing was showing. You couldn't even see my underwear. I don't flash!”
Even with Playboy's "economic" crisis, I don't think Sondra would make the cut. But who knows...

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

This May Be On The Next NYT Bestseller

He's only 9, but this little pickup artist already knows plenty about pleasing the ladies.
So much, in fact, that Alec Greven's dating primer, "How to Talk to Girls" - which began as a handwritten, $3 pamphlet sold at his school book fair - hit the shelves nationwide last week.

The fourth-grader advises Romeo wannabes to stop showing off, go easy on the compliments to avoid looking desperate - and be wary of "pretty girls." It is apparently easy to spot pretty girls because they have, "big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry," he writes in Chapter Three.
"Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil."

He advises, "The best choice for most boys is a regular girl. Remember, some pretty girls are coldhearted when it comes to boys. Don't let them get to you."

Over a few Shirley Temples yesterday at Langan's on West 47 Street, Alec said that he culled his wisdom by peeking at his peers at play. "I saw a lot of boys that had trouble talking to girls," Alec said. As for his how-to, he concedes, "I never expected people to buy it like a regular book in a bookstore."

But with classic plain-spoken advice - like "comb your hair and don't wear sweats" - it's no surprise his 46-page book was a hit with boys and girls of all ages.

He believes the best way to approach a girl is to keep it to a simple "hi." "If I say hi and you say hi back, we're probably off to a good start," he said.
As for his own love life, he said he is not dating anyone at the moment. "I'm a little too young," he confessed. In his book, published by HarperCollins, he suggests holding off on falling in love until at least middle school. Dating - which he defines as going out to dinner without your parents - is for "kind of old" people, who are 15 or 16.

Officials at the Soaring Hawk Elementary School said he wrote the book - which was the runaway bestseller at its book fair - for kids, but believe anyone can find inspiration in it.
Alec's mother, Erin Greven, credits her son's beyond-his-years insight to his avid reading.
"He reads nonstop. At dinner, I say, 'Put your book down,' " she said. Alec - who just finished a children's book on the Watergate scandal - said he wants to be a full-time writer when he grows up, with a weekend job in archaeology or paleontology.

I Would Have Rather....

Seen Tina continue the "80s" leather skirt look. This (LITERAL) alien look is unreal. Still rocking those legs though!

A Jazzy Walrus

Sarah the walrus plays a mean air saxophone, and isn't above shaking her wal-tush for attention. This is just unbelievably cute...check out the video below.

10 Strange Laws Abroad

We're all heard about the ridiculous, archaic laws here, stuff about shooting bison from trains and grazing your cows on Boston Common and so forth. But it's imperative to be aware of completely useless laws in other parts of the world, in case you should happen to travel there and find yourself in a really, really unlikely situation. So, here are some stupid laws you may need to know when you go abroad:

1. Australia - It is illegal to roam the streets wearing black clothes, felt shoes and black shoe polish on your face as these items are the tools of a cat burglar.

2. France - Between the hours of 8AM and 8PM, 70% of the music in the radio must be by French composers.

3. Thailand - It is illegal to leave your house if you are not wearing underwear (This unfortunately may be a slight issue for some of my dearest friends).

4. Italy - It is an offence for women of 'ill repute or evil looks' to enter a cheese factory in the area of Ferrara.

5. Scotland - It is illegal to be a drunk while in possession of a cow.... again, I'm worried.

6. France - It is illegal in Antibes to take photos of police officers or police vehicles, even if they are just in the background.

7. Lebanon - Men are legally allowed to have sex with animals so long as the animals are female. It is illegal to have sex with a male animal.

8. China - Women are prohibited from walking around a hotel room in the nude. A woman may only be naked whilst in the bathroom. (this can't possibly be followed)

BUT, my personal favorite--

9. In Hong Kong, a woman is legally allowed to kill her cheating husband, only if she uses her bare hands. The husband's lover however may be killed in any manner desired.

You Mean They're Not The Same Person?

Katy Perry, of "I Kissed A Girl" fame, and Zooey Deschanel(indie rock singer) seriously look the same... The eyes, the hair, lip color -- THE WHOLE FACE basically.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Cyber Fashion Monday

Whew, trying to catch up on work is going to be impossible today! To keep you guys entertained, why not check out the zillions of Cyber Monday sales going on?

Intermix - 15% off sale & full priced items with the code "CYBER" at checkout!

Old Navy - Get 20% off with the code "SAVENOW" at checkout!

Singer 22 - Get 20% off with the code "TURKEY20" at checkout!

Eye Candy Buy Candy - Get 40% off with the code "OMG40"

Manhattinite - Get 40% off with the code "CyberMonday" at checkout!

Piperlime - Get 20% off with the code "MONDAY" at checkout!

Queen Bee - Get 40% off all full-priced items with the code "BLACKFRIDAY08" at checkout!

Victoria's Secret - Get 20% off your order (except Ugg, Frye and the Fantasy Bra) with the code "GET20" at checkout. This sale lasts until Wed!

EDressMe - Certain designer dresses for only $75

Looking Kind Of Dapper

I haven't seen any photos of Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore lately... but then came across this one. They do look quite lovely and have outlasted all of the Hollywood doubters and indeed, outlasted most Hollywood marriage/romances - over 3 years now!

Wardrobe Malfunction

Was this not a known danger to Ginger Spice when she put on this dress? Could she have possibly PURPOSELY wore this item like this?

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I Want This!

This is awesome! Check out this fiber optic wallpaper... If you want it now though, you'll have to blow $231 on just ONE roll. There are several color options, but it looks like you're limited to flowers as far as the design goes. Here's to bringing wallpaper back! I think it would be too much for a large room, but really cool for a dining nook or small living space.

Simpson Needs to Go Easy On The Collagen

Why does Jessica Simpson INSIST on getting lip injections? She always looks terrible!

Does She Really Need Them?

Eva Longoria was recently snapped with her SPANX showing. She is the tinest woman-- what can those Spanx possibly be holding in??

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

I Want These... Right Now!!

So what if these boots came out earlier in the season? I want them RIGHT NOW! Do you know how hard it is to find boots these days? Especially for girls with more, shall I say, "athletic" calves??? I tried these on and they fit like a dream and are outrageously gorgeous with a suit or jeans... If you're on the market, RUN don't walk for these Tory Burch Motorcycle Boots- they are almost sold out across the country!
BUT- I have a connection. E-mail if you want these boots for 20% off!

Monday, November 17, 2008

Been There Before...

This clearly must be Katherine Heigl at the end of the night... drunk, snacking (on a BIG MAC, no less) and of course, barefoot. Pleasenotice the splotchy-ness all over her face- she must also be allergic to certain alcohols. Heigl is just lovin' it.

Price Upon Request

If you read enough fashion magazines, you'll surely come across pieces marked "Price Upon Request" on the same page as items happily informing you they are $250,000. I always assumed that meant the cost was so astronomical that you would go blind just seeing it. Apparently this is not always the case, as the NY Times investigated.

In fact, more than half the time the item in question just never went into production! "Two editors at different fashion publications, who would not speak publicly because they did not want to embarrass their employers, said “price upon request” was usually a misnomer. It has become a euphemism used to credit designs that were never produced for sale. It is appearing more commonly, they said, for a clear reason: less and less runway fashion is actually being produced."Lies, all lies! Though supposedly "'We say ‘price upon request’ when an item isn’t produced because the designer will make the item at cost, if they decide to, depending on interest.'"...which ultimately still means REALLY RIDICULOUSLY INSANELY expensive.


Interesting Skin Care...

This really can't be real... there is this "exciting" new skin treatment which promises to permanently revitalize aging skin with injection of healthy young skin cells. OK- that sounds ok-until you hear that those young skin cells come from babies' foreskins. Yes, newborn babies are circumcised and then the foreskins are sent to a lab and turned into anti-aging potion or whatever.

Developed by a biomedical company, "Vavelta" is a clear liquid, made from millions of microscopic new skin cells cultured from babies' foreskins, which is then injected into the skin to treat wrinkles, sun damage, and scars. The clinical trials, which took place in London using "material" from a US hospital, have just been completed and reportedly show the technique to be "astonishingly effective." This is maybe no less insane than paralyzing your face with poison four times a year- but it's certinaly a lot creepier.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Not Just Another Beyonce Video...

Justin Timberlake made a surprise appearance on SNL with Beyonce last night. Check out what happens when Beyonce gets new male dancers for her “Single Ladies” music video. Edit in Terminal

Friday, November 14, 2008

Best Butt?

The results are in and the winners are a 20 year old Brazilian girl named Melanie Nunes Fronckowiak and a French guy named Saiba Bombote. Congratulations, girl with unpronounceable name! You will now be forever known as that girl who won the Butt Contest.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

What Recession?

Louis Vuitton has just launched two patented diamond cuts.

The Vuitton diamonds have between 61 and 77 facets and have been set into a bracelet, a pair of earrings, two brooches, a ring and a necklace-the latter consisting of 1,001 tiny brilliant-cut diamonds totaling 15 carats, coexisting with 65 round flower diamonds (49 carats) and 79 pointed ones (44 carats), for a combined bling bang of 108 carats that retails for about $4 million.
I guess times aren't tough for everybody...


Packing On Thirteen Pounds for Nine

Fergie looking not her usual svelte self, as she put on 13 pounds for a recent movie role in "Nine." She did it by eating fish and chips apparently... what I noticed most was how busty she looked! That is crazy!


Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Best Costume Ever!

I love it when dogs dress up... some consider it to be a form of animal cruelty, but those people are just wrong. How can a pekingneses dressing up as an iPhone be wrong? :)

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Why Would He Do That?

A British 19-year-old has officially changed his name to “Captain Fantastic Faster Than Superman Spiderman Batman Wolverine Hulk And The Flash Combined.” The Glastonbury, England, teenager -- originally named George Garratt -- said his new name, which is thought to be the world's longest, has so outraged his grandmother that she is no longer speaking to him, The Telegraph reported Monday. The teen said he used an online service to officially change his name for a $20 fee. "I wanted to be unique," Captain Fantastic said of his name choice. "I decided upon a theme of superheroes." Why not just Clark Kent?

It's Election Day! Now if these kids can't get you out...

This is way too cute... the original showed about 50 kids. How do you find 50 talented little ones like this? I can't deal!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

I Think This Is Taking "Slutty" Halloween Too Far...

Any child's costume with the name "wench" should probably be banned...

Thursday, October 23, 2008

More Brilliant Folks From Lousiana

I guess if you are going to be stupid enough to commit a crime, then don’t forget your purse at the scene. Miss Teen Louisiana, Lindsey Evans ,has disgraced her title after doing a ‘dine and dash’ with her friends, dissing a bill of $46.07, but as it turns out, that’s definitely the least of her worries.

Evans, who might not be so bright, discovered that she had left her purse behind and decided to go back and get it. Problem for her was that the police arrested her for theft when she appeared back on the scene. To make matters worse, they did a search of her bag and found marijuana so they added a charge of drug possession. While her reign is set to end next month, a spokesman for the Miss Louisiana Teen USA organization said they had yet to decide what the repercussions will be for Evans. Maybe they should call Donald Trump and ask for his advice since he is an old pro at pageant scandals.

I Guess The French Are Just Oblivious to the Recession

Chanel continues to live by a kind of oblivious "no time like the present!" mantra, what with its recent news of a 20% price increase on its classic handbags, set to take effect November 1. According to fashion blog nitro:licious, a Classic Caviar Jumbo Flap Bag (above) that currently retails for $2,850 will jump to $3,420 in a mere couple weeks.

Together Again

DJ AM, since checking out of the hospital, has rekindled his relationship with Mandy Moore who flew to his side in the days following his escape from a deadly plane crash with Travis Barker. The couple were photographed together over the weekend (above) and aren't being shy about the reunion, according to Us Weekly:

"It's back on," a DJ A.M. source says in the newest issue of Us Weekly , on stands now. "Since the accident, it's blossomed into something again." Continues the insider, "Mandy said, 'I like this guy a lot and I want to see where it can go again. Life is too short to not be with someone you really care about.'" Says a second DJ A.M. source, "When you go through what Adam went through, you need people you love and people who love you. He will never stop loving her."
Mandy certinly looks like she is glowing.

Fun On A Thursday...

Unbelievable McCain Vs. Obama Dance-Off - Watch more free videos

As election time gets closer... just a reminder to Vote!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

More Stuff A Recession Prone US Needs...

Victoria’s Secret has just come out with their new “Black Diamond Fantasy Miracle Bra” which costs a whopping $5 million because it’s made with 3,575 black diamonds, 117 white diamonds and 34 rubies. Oh, there’s also two black diamonds that swing down from the bra. Perfect for everyday wear under a white tee-shirt! Notably... even Victoria's Secret has scaled back, because in 2003, the "fantasy" bra was $11 million, last year it was $6.5..now, BLACK diamonds (again, the dirtiest of diamonds) and "ONLY" $5 million? How considerate of Victoria's Secret to look out for us little people.

Google: Now Preventing Drunk E-Mailing...

Google recently unveiled a Gmail application, cleverly named "Mail Goggles", that may help prevent drunk emailing. When in use, the program requires a potential emailer to solve a few mathematical problems before the message can be sent. The service is set by default to kick in only on weekend nights, but you can change the settings to apply whenever. (Again, geniuses over there at Google). Pretty clever, now make something similar for cell phones and we'll be set... I must say- I've never drunk mailed, but drunk dial or text... another story. Google- just changing the world...

Not Good... Not Good At All..

Are these photos of Tara Reid photoshopped or not? This can't possibly be real... This has got to be the job of a bad surgeon. I don't care what kind of hard partying or drugs she has done - this has got to be physically impossible... Now I've seen pictures of her stomach like this before- so that is probably real. But does her butt really look like that??

Really? Will Smith?

I was just reading that a former Hollywood Madame tells Ian Halperin that Smith “has swung both ways for years” and hired two male prostitutes off of her. She continues to reveal that, "I had to reassure him over and over that I could guarantee discretion. Once I convinced him I could, he placed his order. It was for a man. I had 14 women working for me and two guys. You’d be surprised at how many Hollywood stars requested the services of the guys."

I don't know... I think you've really made it when people rumor you to be gay. Tom Cruise, John Travolta and now Will Smith. Of course, when you can't make it - a la Lindsay Lohan - just pretend to be gay for real and come out of the closet for some publicity...However, these things always have a smidge of truth, right? I mean, how long ago were these same magazines/tabloids reporting the demise of Guy Ritchie and Madonna?



I can't take how cute these babies are... and so PC.... 

Monday, October 20, 2008

Listen Carefully...

In the middle of reporting news, it's always fun when...

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

If I Were A Boy..













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Finally! A new Beyonce song I like!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Beyonce - Single Girls

The new video... eh. The song is ok, sounds similar to the rest of her songs. I'm wondering, however, if she is wearing butt pads in this video. Hmm....

A New (UN)Wrinkle in the Campaign

Looking at before and after photos of his eyebrows and forehead, people are surmising that Joe Biden may have received botox... must be ROCKET scientists or doctors that are able to come to this conclusion. My question is- why not the whole forehead? Why just the middle section? More natural??

Monday, October 13, 2008

Real or Fake?

This clip of a wedding accident is making its way around the Internet. Real or fake?

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Really? Did that Really Happen?

Did McCain refuse to shake the hand of Obama post-debate, instead instructing him to say hi to his wife instead? Awkward...

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

I Love It!

I'm not sure if that little capelet item is a part of Natalie Portman's dress or just a separate item... whatever it is, it's fabulous. Portman seems to following the cardinal rule of looking extra-fab post breakup, as she is newly single after splitting with folk-rocker boyfriend Devendra Banhart.

To Be Believed?

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are allegedly engaged! Timberlake supposedly popped the question while he and Biel were at Seventh Heaven star Beverly Mitchell's wedding in Rome. Guess he's decided to make an honest woman of her... According to the rumors, the couple is planning to get married within the next year and Jess wants a big wedding. Also, Justin is reportedly “besotted with Jessica.” Umm... what does besotted mean? I think this is a ploy by Justin and Jessica to promote a new single, like, "Besot".


Monday, October 6, 2008

Now The Real Question Is... Is That Photo Been "Shopped?"

Kim Kardashian is "sick" of people saying that she's had plastic surgery, so to get people to stop talking about it, she's decided to post a picture of herself in a bikini…when she was 14. Kim says, "I hope after seeing this you guys will never ask me a plastic surgery question again! I have had a size C since I was 11 years old!" She also has advice for anyone considering getting plastic surgery, "If you are considering plastic surgery, please please please know you can never ever change it back and you will never be the same. That could be a very good thing or a very bad thing! Make sure you have thought long and hard and that the plastic surgeon is board certified and has an amazing track record! Don’t ever take the cheaper way out!"

Thanks, Kim, for this sexy, vaguely inappropriate PSA... but seriously- when was that bikini a good idea?


You've Got Mail

You know that insatiable feeling you have to check your Blackberry when the light turns red... well, now you can replicate it with mail for your computer! This little $17 USB gadget lights up whenever you receive new email. It can turn green, blue, or red to indicate which account the mail is from and looks like a little envelope. Because actually checking your mail is TOO difficult. How do people think of these inventions?Like people don't obsessively check their mail already...

Is This Necessary?

Has anyone else seen the Girls Next Door where Pamela Anderson delivered a cake completely naked to Hugh Hefner for his 82nd birthday? All Hef could say was, “you’re lookin’ good.”
I really can't say the same- she's looking crazy amounts of tired for 40.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

I Love Creative Bums

Disturbing Trend...

Some people are upset that piercing isn’t as edgy as it used to be, and have decided to pierce their brains as a result. SOOOO CHIC. The process is remarkably similar to piercing a nose or an ear, except it involves drilling small holes in your skull and pressing a ring to the most vital organ in your entire body. I cringe just looking...

A Real Life Bambi

A tiny baby deer was delivered three weeks early by Caesarean section after his mother was hit by a car. While the story is really sad, look how cute that baby deer is!

Monday, September 29, 2008

Real or Fake?

This couple celebrated their nuptials with their idealized version of a wedding cake — a ginormous cheeseburger. I seriously doubt she made any changes to her diet for the "big" day.

Bullet Points For What Happened To Our Economy/Financial Market Today

So... just in case you've been hiding under a rock, here are the basics.
  • That compromise bailout plan intended to save the economy? Yeah, it failed.

  • The Dow proceeded to drop 778 points, the largest one-day loss in nearly 2 decades. Many people just kissed their asses and life savings goodbye.

  • Republicans blame Nancy Pelosi for giving an offensive speech before the vote, which included partisan remarks like recognizing that Bush inherited surpluses and now the economy sucks.

  • Citigroup just bought out Wachovia's banking sector, eliminating more competition.

2-For-1 Sweet Tomatoes Coupons!

I can't attach "pdf" files to this blog. So, if you want a "2-for-1" coupon for Sweet Tomatoes, e-mail me. Offer good until October 9, 2008.

4pm DUI? Who Knew Heather Was Such A Party Animal?

As if you haven't turned on the news, but just had to write that Heather Locklear was arrested at 4:30 p.m. for suspicion of driving under the influence of a controlled substance. She was picked up in Montecito after someone called 911 to report an erratic driver.
The LA Times reports: "Locklear showed bizarre behavior, driving back and forth over a pair of sunglasses on the pavement and revving her engine. After leaving the parking lot, she stopped her car on the street and stumbled into the traffic lane, according to the caller, who followed Locklear out of concern, Marshall said.When the CHP officer arrived, Locklear's car was parked on State Route 192 partially blocking a lane, Marshall said. The officer talked to her and determined that she was disoriented and "under the influence of something." She was taken to the CHP's Santa Barbara-area office to be tested for alcohol and drugs.Locklear tested negative for alcohol. Other drug tests will be returned in a few days, Marshall said."

Judging by her mugshot, there's no way Heather Locklear will even realize she's been arrested until at least Wednesday - of next week. I mean- can her pupils get BIGGER?!?

Friday, September 26, 2008

I Need Halloween Costume Ideas??!

Anyone have anything awesome-ly original?!?! "Couple" costumes are encouraged...but I will take anything at this point!! My top two above....