Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Surprisingly Normal

Ashley Olson looks not only normal- but actually looks GOOD and age appropriate. What no fur? Or Mink Headband? or oversize sweater?

What's Up With This Pose...

And mmore importantly, what's up with Tim McGraw's...ummm... pants? Is that a gun..or is he just happy to see me?

Hilarious...



Eeeeerbody is talking about it...

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

PhotoShop of Horrors

This is the most blatant example of photoshop I've ever seen... This is Kimberly Stewart by the way.

Which One Is Which?

Can you tell the difference between Hulk Hogan's girlfriend and daughter, Brooke Hogan? Yeah, neither can I. It's almost erie how similar looking they are.

Monday, April 28, 2008

WTF??? THIS SERIOUSLY CAN'T BE REAL


For Your Consideration: Worst Thing to Air on Daytime TV

A few days ago, the Tyra Banks show was supposed to be about "unlikely couples" who fall in love, but it ended up being about people with fetishes who happen to find one another and make it work. One of the couples featured was Eddie and Gem. Eddie, is an average-sized dude who has always been into plus-sized women, found his soul mate in Gem, who indulges his fantasy of watching her eat (carbs, in particular), and also engages in "squashing," which is when she plops down on his body repeatedly, or just lays on top of him, applying large amounts of pressure to his body with her own weight... don't miss her bounce off the bed. CLASSIC.

Just What I Need...A Teeny Weeny Drive



I bet people can't wait to back up into this - The Teeny Weeny Drive (sorry too easy of a pun). It's a 1 GB flash drive that looks like a veiny poker that "blushes" when plugged into your machine, so you can be sure that its "turned on". OH- and are you surprised, this is the ONLY penis shaped USB drive... WOW, I can hardly believe it. The video is priceless. The USB drive is like rubbing against the computer to a cheap Frank Sinatra instrumental "Strangers in the Night" and boldly switches to "Bringin' Sexy Back"...

Unreal...

There are just unreal expectations for women who recently had children... Halle Barry, only after six weeks of giving birth, is back down to her normal size - except for her umm... "enlarged" chest area a la Christina Aguilera.

That's the Size Of Rhode Island

In sharp contrast to Carmen Electra's ring last week, check out Mariah Carey's HUGE ASS engagement ring. It's "reported" that the ring is from Nick Cannon... remember Nick Cannon's previous engagement ring for Selita Ebanks- that ring was 15 carats... surely, Mariah knew he couldn't go any smaller...
My guess is that she purchased it herself.. why? BECAUSE SHE CAN.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Chintzy To The Face

Photos of Carmen Electra's "black diamond" engagement ring just surfaced and the ring looks chintzy to the face. The pave styling of the band makes it looks like a ring from a Cracker Jack box... why not have the diamonds go all the way around? If not all the way around, then how about to a point where you don't see a definite line of demarcation of NOTHINGNESS.


"It's a black diamond, perfect for us," Electra tells PEOPLE. "Different – it's our style." OKEE.


Just as an FYI, the price per carat for black diamonds is crap- after all, who really wants a black diamond? You can essentially get a replica of Carmen Electra's black diamond at: http://www.mysolitaire.com/Jewelry/JewelryDetails/Template4.aspx?Item_ID=3665&iCat_id=263 - the "center" stone is close to 2 carats flanked with a pave band is $1,500. I have not dropped any zeros or missed any commas - almost two carats will run you $1,500. But besides taht, Congratulations on your third marriage.

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20195382,00.html

That's Some Expensive Shit

With all the shit you put on your face did you ever think about putting actual shit on your face? Apparently some people do. A spa in New York City offers a $180 "Geisha Facial" (in a massage parlor I'm sure) that includes one special ingredient: bird poop. Apparently, nightingale shit has been used for centuries in Japan by Geisha and Kabuki dancers to take off their stage makeup and remove wrinkles. But isn't $180 a bit much to have someone rub shit on your face — I mean R. Kelly will do it for free.



If you're TRULY interested, you can actually buy it for ONLY $20 here: http://chidoriyaworld.stores.yahoo.net/nigdrop.html



http://www.reuters.com/article/lifestyleMolt/idUSN2542211820080425?feedType=RSS&feedName=lifestyleMolt

Someone Make Her A CEO



There is this LAME new reality show on called "Miss Rap Supreme" and Khia entered it. You may know Khia from "My Neck, My Back" song. Anyways, Khia was kicked off...she may seem upset, but according to this video, Khia isn't that upset about it. Khia is basically saying that she didn't enter the competition to win, but for "the opportunity to promote my muthafuckin' self on muthafuckin' TV. That's what the muthafuckin' hell." Is she really talking about recovering crack addicts?

Nothin' Comes Between Serena and Her Calvins...



Dude... these are by FAR the tightest jeans I have ever seen on a person. I dare Serena to try to get something in that pocket...

Strictly Dickly

I've always wanted to say strictly dickly, it makes no sense here, but anyways... Researchers from the Cancer Council of Victoria found that men who masturbate more than five times each week were one-third less likely to develop the cancer." Ooh, good for them! Jerk offs.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,352278,00.html

What All Retired "Escorts" Do: Write Books and Become "Shrewd" Business Women

Meet Amanda Brooks. She was raised in Texas, went to college and graduated with a double degree in photography and English. She entered the workforce, found a job she really enjoyed and then retired... At the age of 29. Her chosen profession? Internet call girl. And like any retired person with valuable advice, Ms. Brooks has written a couple of books: The Internet Escort's Handbook, volumes 1 and 2.

The first book deals with "basic mental, emotional and physical considerations in escort work." The second is about advertising and marketing. A little digging revealed that the book has chapters titled "Are You A People Person? How Can You Become One?" and, under "Your Personal Appearance" are sections named "Breasts," "Weight And Proportions," "Hair," "Stretch Marks," "Teeth and Breath," "The Period Question," and, of course, "Ejaculation (Face or Specific Body Part)." SOOO Very thorough. Oh! And — here's the difference between an escort and a cheap hooker, in case you were wondering:

"If you are selling your time, undivided attention, and the (unspoken) offer of sexual entertainment, you're an escort. If you're selling a specific sexual activity for a certain amount of money, you're a prostitute. If you won't have sex with the man you're dating unless he buys you an expensive dinner, you're a (relatively cheap) prostitute."

PRICELESS

1) couple of round of drinks =$30

2) waking up at work drunk=$0

3) taking the bus home to have breakfast before going back to work=$2

4) hospital bills for knife sticking out of your back=$4500

5) The BBC writing an article about the ordeal where you are quoted 'We were drinking and what doesn't happen when you're drunk?' = PRICELESS

Thursday, April 24, 2008

I Think I Said This A While Ago, BUT...



What the fuck happened to Carmen Electra? Seriously, what is going on? Anyways, I guess to the "story", Carmen Electra is engaged to this douche bag looking guy. And better yet, Carmen's rep has confirmed it! What? No denials? No refusing to comment???? Is she so off the radar that even her rep knows that "denial" game is fruitless here, because no one would care??

Anyways, Carmen got engaged to her boyfriend, rocker Rob Patterson. The Korn guitarist proposed this past weekend in Vegas while there to celebrate Carmen's 36th birthday. The couple has been dating for less than a year, so let's hope the marriage lasts longer. As for the ring, a source adds, "He told friends three days ago that he got engaged. The ring is a black diamond set in white diamonds." Uhm, a black diamond? That's inneresting. Carmen is quickly turning into the next Elizabeth Taylor- but from the trailer.

LOVE THIS ITEM!!

I don't know where Blake Lively purchased this item, but I love it. It's almost too much, but I love it. I LOVE IT.

Is Naomi's Weave Causing Her To Bald?

What's a supermodel without her super hair - or any hair? Naomi Campbell appears to be going bald, according to the Daily Mail, most likely because of years of wearing tightly woven hair extensions.


According to hairfinder.com, 'traction alopecia' is the name of the type of hair loss associated with hair braiding, weaving, and the wearing of hair extensions. Celebrities such as Paris Hilton and Britney Spears are both reported to have suffered hair loss as a result of their extensions.
Prolonged traction can and will cause permanent loss of hair in the affected areas, but if caught early, this type of hair loss is reversible.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/showbiznews.html?in_article_id=561504&in_page_id=1773

Sex And The City: Theme Song

YESS! I can't wait for this movie to come out, so every little bit counts... Apparently, Fergie has recorded what appears to be the theme song for the Sex And The City Movie and it is awesome! Seriously. It's a upbeat track that uses the original instrumental music from the show, with Fergie doing the usual sing-rapping lyrics like: "Shopping for labels, shopping for love... Manolo and Louis is all I'm thinking of... Emotional baggage just replace them with Dior... Let's stop chasing the boys and shop some more..." (sorry I couldn't rip it off the website...)

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20194808,00.html

McDonald's: Designer Coffee and Now Designer Uniforms

In an interesting move, McDonald's (only London at this time) is providing its staff with a new range of uniforms designed by Bruce Oldfield- who is famous for dressing Princess Diana, Jemima Khan and Sienna Miller, in an attempt to appear more "upmarket."

The old outfit's bright colours have been replaced with more subtle shades of black, beige and brown for an air-hostess style uniforms. Female management and front of house staff will wear high heels, pencil skirts and scarves, male counterparts will have suits, and the staff who serve the food will wear polo shirts, all in similar colours.
Is that even comfortable to wear around all that microwaved and processed food? Is she really going to be frying up some food and wearing long sleeves? How unpractical... I love it :)

http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30400-1313679,00.html?f=rss

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Why Wear A Midriff?

Brooke Hogan was out checking Florida Atlantic University ("FAU"), but why in a midriff and low cut halter top? Also, she lives on South Beach, wouldn't going to FAU be too much of a drive? Did UM reject her already? HIDS.

The Ultimate Arm Pose

Mariah Carey performing the ultimate "arm" pose... however, she looks like she is a broke down rag doll... This arm pose is a bit EXTREME, she (however) does look skinny here.

This Must Be Her New "Look"


I can't tell if this is an improvement or a digression for Mrs. Amy Winehouse. At least she isn't flashing us too...

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Even Celebrities...


Get pissed on by dogs... This must be for a movie, because Natalie Portman does not look one bit shocked or upset that a dog is pissing on her and her coat. But then again.. she is dating that homeless looking character these days (Devendra Banhart), so maybe it turns him on. Just read the article carefully... this is not for a movie, she just got straight up R. kelly style pissed on.

http://theblemish.com/2008/04/natalie-portman-was-peed-on/

Should She Really Have Her Own Makeup Line?

You know what Sephora is really missing…a makeup line by Dolly Parton! “I want my own cosmetics line,” Parton told Billboard magazine. “When I first came [to Nashville] I really was the backwoods Barbie. Too much make-up, too much hair, the big boobs, country girl straight out of the mountains. It’s hard to take somebody looking like that serious, I guess, so I had to work double hard to prove myself.” I will take some of that "Backwoods Barbie" mascara please.



http://blogs.fashionweekdaily.com/?p=3421

Booty Pop...Booty Pop...

This morning on Live With Regis & Kelly, Kelly Ripa confessed that she is addicted to a new undergarment called "Booty Pop." What is that exactly?! Anyways, contrary to its strange name (and box), Booty Pops are not grown-up diapers, as their name might suggest, but panties with a built-in push-up "bra" for butt-cheeks... I don't know how much these are, but red beans and rice is only $1.99.

Monday, April 21, 2008

$375 vs. $29: Take The Challenge



One dress is $375, while the other is $29... can you tell the difference? I suppose I shouldn't expect much from "Elizabeth and James", the clothing line from the Olson twins (the people responsible for garbage fashion)... but I was hoping for a bit more.
If you haven't guessed, the photo on the left is the E&J dress from Shopbop, but while the dress on the right is straight up Forever 21... Did you guess right??

Remember When...

Understandably, this is a photo of Miley Cyrus looking quite scandalous with a young lad... however, in line with my post the other day about "overalls" coming back, I couldn't help but notice those "goomy" bracelets (little rubber bracelets I guess) Miley was wearing that EVERY girl in the 80s wore thanks to Ms. Madonna herself.
Now that I think about it- doesn't the color of the bracelet symbolize how "far" you are willing to go... white=nothing, pink = 1st base, red = something... black = all the way? I swear there was a documentary about kids and the color bracelet they wear meaning something... Thoughts?

Asking For The Ring Back? NOT Baller...

Kanye West has reportedly dumped longtime girlfriend/fiancé Alexis Phifer. Kanye allegedly told Alexis, "I just don't think it is going to work out anymore." He even asked for the ring back! TRIED.



http://www.blackvoices.com/blogs/2008/04/18/all-falls-down-kanye-west-ends-engagement-to-fiance-alexis/

Even Celebrities...

Have to wait at the airport. Does Vivica A. Fox not look completely ghetto-fied and annoyed? And of ALLLL of the empty seats in the world, that strange looking Asian man picked a seat next to Ms. Fox? What is up with that? And more importantly, what is up with her shoes?

What Recession? Let's Go For $1,000 Sushi


Going out for sushi always runs slightly on the expensive side, but Koi restaurant in New York is taking it to the extreme with their latest menu addition, the High Roller sushi roll that sells for $1000. So what does a thousand dollars look like in the form of sushi? Well, it starts with marinated and poached fois gras (disgusting to me already) that is covered with excessive amounts of "Langoustine" (lobster for us non-foodies). Then the roll is brushed with saffron/vanilla bean butter and encrusted with caviar. Finally, when the roll is served the Chef comes tableside to shave white Alba truffles and drizzle them with 100 year balsamic.

Does this sound appealing to anyone? Usually with these excessively expensive food/drink items, you "get" something. Like the $20,000 martini "comes" with a diamond or there is gold at the end of the rainbow. SOMETHING. Seriously, who would get this?

http://nymag.com/daily/food/2008/04/damn_the_recession_and_order_a.html

Feeling the Tie-Dye...

I normally wouldn't like this look, but somehow the tie-dye jeans look fresh and really nice on Fergie. Who am I kidding? I love tie-dye, I always have.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Jessica Simpson Is A Lush - Surprise!

If you remember, Jessica Simpson was rushed to hospital at the end of March for what her reps claimed was a "kidney infection." Turns out her problems were located more in the liver region. On top of that Jessica thought she was pregnant from all the drunk sex. Interesting turn around, I would say. Star reports: Jessica's health problems were "brought on by drinking an obscene amount of alcohol," says the source. "She was treated for a kidney infection, a bladder infection and a urinary tract infection."Adding to her distress, anxious Jessica asked doctors to give her a pregnancy test! "She was a nervous wreck," says the insider. "She was three weeks late and convinced she was pregnant. She was feeling really weak and really scared. She was unraveling."

However, it turns out Tony Romo might be the source of her troubles. "She used to keep her drinks to a minimum, because she's very conscientious about the calories," says a source. "But Tony and his buddies really party hard, and I think they expect Jessica to keep up with them. But she is like a third of their weight and just can't hold as much as they can."

Are Overalls Back?

Ugh... I suppose all trends have a certain "circle of life", but I thought some would never make it back. Undoubtedly, overalls may be back... why? I don't even think they are comfortable to wear if you're painting.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Why?


I know I frequently ask this- but what is the advantage of not putting on a bra? Especially with a tee shirt or tank that is paper thin? I don't find wearing a bra THAT restrictive... seriously. Here is Aubrey O'Day of Danity Kane flashing what little dignity remains.... I thought their last album did fairly well, does she really need this cheap press? Apparently.

What's Wrong With This Picture?

I'm happy that Britney Spears has finally decided to put down the Starbucks/McDonalds combo, but why the sunglasses? They can't possibly be comfortable when you start running and sweating... slipping and sliding. Whatever...

So Small? I Can BARELY See It...

Luckily, my investigative skills uncovered a close up of Ashlee's ring.... Looks kind of like an Ascher cut with a legacy flair... Gorgeous.

Poor Journalism



Matt Lauer reels Ashlee Simpson in to show the ring- but then the camera crew completely misses the moment...Annoying.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Painfully Pale...

Evan Rachel Woods is painfully pale. Who likes pale people? It looks terrible to me- but is it because I'm immersed in a "western" culture. In the "east", the whiter you are- the better. In fact that are whitening booths in China, rather than tanning. What's that about? Then again, have you seen an Asian women in her 50s+, no Botox necessary...maybe they're on to something.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

This Is Animal Abuse

I seriously hope this is fake... a 35 pound cat? UGH. It looks like it swallowed a WHALE. I can't even continue I'm so disgusted.

Does This Make My Butt Look Big?

Kim Kardashian has got to have butt pads in there. That is unreal.

I Think Everyone Has Seen This Already...



But, I wanted to post it anyways... and I present to you, the "YouTube" divorce. I personall think she's an idiot to vent and make a lot of these comments - like "never had sex" with him. Is not consumating a marriage still grounds for divorce? Or is that just a family law rumor?

Monday, April 14, 2008

Dick Likes Hunting and Fishing...

Dick Cheney had a fly fishing trip over the weekend. No big deal... until you add in the fact that there are naked women all over his boat and that he posted these pictures on the White House website!!! Is it ironic that he's on "Snake" River? heh.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

An Issued Apology!

How crazy is this? Enough people complained such that http://www.lexico.com/ has issued the following apology on its website regarding synonyms for the word "weaker"... check it out below and at: http://www.lexico.com/blog/2008/04/09/addressing-our-weaknesses/:


"Hi, I’m Barbara Ann Kipfer, PhD., editor and compiler of
Roget’s New Millenium Thesaurus. The synonym “weaker sex” appears in many
thesauruses for terms like woman, lady, and female. It is considered an
informal, possibly derogatory, synonym for those words. Due to the way our
search technology works, a search for weaker appeared to suggest that it was a
synonym for female and lady. This was incorrect and has been fixed.
We take
your concerns about language and society seriously (this is, after all, our
business) and after reading feedback on the entries for female and lady, we carefully
reviewed our editorial decisions. In light of how our customers use
Thesaurus.com on a daily basis, we chose to remove “weaker sex” as a
informal/slang synonym from our site. The entries now describe current American
English usage more accurately and we feel we’re providing more helpful
suggestions for those seeking guidance on word choice from us.
We apologize
for any confusion this situation may have caused and hope you’ll stay in touch
with us as we strive to improve all the learning resources we provide on
Thesaurus.com, Dictionary.com and Reference.com."

Speaking of Lesbians...

I saw this post on Perez and have a few comments. 1) I didn't know that Cynthia Nixon was a lesbian; and 2) I though this was Cynthia's child or kid brother - turns out it's Cynthia's girlfriend!!!!! What?



http://perezhilton.com/2008-04-10-our-favorite-hobbit

This Is Just Wrong...



Ummm... why would anyone openly talk about this? Check out this clip of Roseanne Barr giving up WAY too much information.

HUH?



I've watched this trailer for Scarlet, a new TV miniseries, three or four times without actually understanding what the show is. She's a fashion model and a movie star, and some old guy screams into the telephone that she's going to change television forever. And meanwhile, she beats up ninjas, does the Batman power-grapple thing, and has weirdly glowing red eyes. Oh, and a group of men follow her around while she tells them they're overlooking crucial evidence. But does this show have a plot, or just lots of posing and kicking?

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

The Bride Wears Botox

My friends are all getting married...and seeing all of these costs adding up is enough to make say, "I would never spend any money on a wedding!" and "I can't believe anyone would lose weight for their big day, how superficial!" and "I am so unmaterialistic and wonderful I'm getting married in a burlap sack at the bottom of a big hole in the dirt because weddings are stupid and they should really be about true love and blah blah blah." But seriously? Fuck that noise.

I totally want a huge-ass wedding and a gorgeous designer dress and I'll probably try to lose five (or fifty) pounds by joining some retarded gym program right before the wedding. There, I said it. But I promise not to go as apeshit as the women profiled today's Guardian. According to the paper, women are getting boob jobs, nose jobs, Botox, teeth straightening, and more than 20% of brides polled by academic researchers "were taking an approach [to weight loss] that the researchers perceived as 'extreme', including downing laxatives, vomiting after meals and adopting a new-found smoking habit as a way to stave off hunger pangs." And then there are fake-tan companies such as Sienna X, which recently launched a bridal service that includes an entire schedule of tan "fittings" for three months before the wedding - to ensure you end up with exactly the right shade.

The article actually gets more absurd... like drinking tea is a "treat". Isn't that just water? WTF? Anyways, all of my little bride to be chick-a-dees...where do you fall?

http://lifeandhealth.guardian.co.uk/fashion/story/0,,2271872,00.html

If you're really interested in "brideorexia"- check out all of these links: http://www.buzzfeed.com/buzz/Brideorexia

What Is Going On?

I love Natalie Portman, but what is up with her new boyfriend? The Sienna Miller sunglasses, the man bag, that unconditioned hair and my personal favorite, they are wearing the same jacket.

BR Monogram





With the impending "recession", does Banana Republic really think it's a good idea to launch its upscale line? Anyways, Banana Republic is apparently stepping up the luxury by launching their newest line called BR Monogram. The new high-end collection will have "all the goodness of traditional Banana Republic, but with a boost in the quality of the fabrics used and better tailoring." This quality upgrade will also mean a pricing upgrade (BR Monogram items cost an average of 30-40% more than the rest of Banana's items) plus there will hopefully be stand-alone BR Monogram boutiques around the country very soon -- the first one just opened in New York.

All the goodness and better tailoring? I sure hope so.. Banana Republic has been one up from crap lately. I wouldn't buy anything in that store FULL PRICE if my life depended on it. I will say, I like their accessories...and I kind of like that gray skirt outfit... but pay $250 for a skirt from Banana? Not ready.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Hot Dog Hands

Does Lisa Bonet's nameless husband have the world's largest hands or not? I'm voting the former...but he's kind of hot in a scruffy Johnny Depp way.